When do you stop feeling guilty for taking time off, for having “unproductive*” time? I struggle with that a lot. I also struggle with consistency and follow-through. I start a great many things, I finish very little.
I have recently made a huge change in my life - I quit my 40 hour a week job and have switched to working a couple part-time jobs - with the expressed goal of finding a way to build my creative practice into my life so I could stop feeling like I had to force my creative life into the cracks left by my working life.
It’s going to be a rough transition and I have to keep reminding myself that I really am at the beginning of a new life, one that is drastically different from any lives lived so far**. I have to keep checking my guilt, and work out my flightiness.
I’ve started (and not kept up) dozens of blogs/journals, but as my life restructures into one that prioritizes sustaining my life through creative development and artistic production I hope to change that as well.
*Whatever that means!
**”Lived so far” as in the way that we live through many phases in our lives as we grow into ourselves. For example, in one of my past lives I managed a laboratory in a petrochemical plant (I was 18).